By the Sea Memory Cafe, part of the town’s mission to aid seniors struggling with dementia has made a critical impact on the town and its residents — but its roots are international, tracing all the way back to the Netherlands.
According to Siobahn McDonald, who leads the cafe, the concept began as an Alzheimer’s Cafe in 1997 in the Netherlands, where its popularity quickly led to similar places opening throughout countries like England, Belgium, France, Sweden and the United States. McDonald said the first cafe came to Massachusetts in 2011, and Swampscott’s first monthly Memory Cafe popped up back in June 2021.
McDonald told of what propelled her onto the path of serving the elderly. “I taught art for 21 years in both Lynn and Danvers, so I had a background in art and education,” McDonald said. “But I also worked as a nurse in schools, so I was very familiar with that, and I had a lovely grandmother who instilled a lot of love in me.”
She went on to add that she developed a familiarity with helping seniors suffering from memory loss due to having several family members who were also struggling with Alzheimer’s. “I was ready for a chance, and I experienced a lot of family members who had Alzheimer’s,” she said. “My father, my mother, my aunt and uncle, so it was a natural thing for me. I thought, ‘I’ve worked with kids for a while, so why not try adults?”
“It’s always been the same principle of ‘How do you care for someone?’ except I don’t have to grade anything anymore.”
She explained the process of learning more about the disease while simultaneously trying to help her family members navigate the complexities of the issue. “I just didn’t have the information then that I have now,” she said. “My uncle had it, and it was very scary, very confusing, and I didn’t know how to communicate with him, but I did know to just be present.”
McDonald emphasized the importance of a team effort in their mission, citing the Director of Aging Services, Heidi Whear, and Outreach Social Worker, Sabrina Clopton, for being instrumental at the cafe. “Our vision was the understanding that there are a lot more people at home living with dementia than there were when I was younger,” McDonald said. “A lot of people take care of their family members in their homes now, so our plan was to make a place where people can come and focus on community.”
The cafe offers a number of fun programs and events that people can participate in and enjoy in a communal way. “I think some of the most impactful work is the visual thinking strategies,” she said. It’s where participants gather and assess different artwork to try and gauge a response from the group in order to generate free-flowing trains of thought and a healthy discussion on the artwork. “It’s great because people can see the art, and it encourages them to think and dig deep into what they see,” McDonald said.
She continued, saying, “Eventually, it continues to where people talk about their own experiences, so that’s a great way to reminisce while also looking at great pieces of art, and people really seem to enjoy it.”
The cafe also offers different themes for each month. Aside from merely looking at art, participants can also create their own art or make edible arrangements with fresh fruit and chocolate. The cafe also has had visits from the police and fire departments with their therapy dogs, as well as musical guests to entertain the participants.
“Memory Cafe is like a key part of that progression towards accepting help and understanding how important the notion of a respite is,” Clopton said regarding dementia and the ways being a caregiver can impact a person.
Clopton reflected on an important moment that reinforced the importance of her work. “We had a couple come, and this is a woman who’s caregiving for a person with early on-set dementia, and he’s having a hard time even reconciling with his own illness. So, a huge part of our work is trying to break that stigma,” Clopton said.
McDonald shared some words of wisdom for any person who may be caring for a family member or friend with dementia. “All I could say is, ‘Come on down.’ We have very talented people here and so many different things to do,” McDonald said. “It’s become just a great place for people to come, and it’s become a huge help to caregivers, who know their family members are in good hands.”
