If you have had the pleasure of visiting the Brudnick Center in Peabody, then you probably know that one resident Mark Singer is something of a local celebrity.
You can’t turn a corner or walk into a room in the place where somebody doesn’t know his name or has been impacted by his unyielding charisma. But for Mark, he was ready to tell a story of resilience, strength, and living every day with passion and love.
He has a saying to keep himself and others grounded — “Slow down, go through life with your eyes wide open, so you can celebrate all life’s little victories.”
Singer continued, “When you go zipping through life from point A to point B, you don’t see all the little things in front of you.”
Singer ran businesses, was an avid golfer and a former financial planner for Safe Harbor Retirement Planning.
“We dealt with about a hundred families, helping them with finances and other things. What was most rewarding for me was just working with the clients,” Singer explained. “I would take mental notes of all they went through, so that I would know what I’d be going through… We always talked about the trips they would take, and I love doing that.”
The reason he didn’t retire early was because he said he loved talking with his clients. “If you love what you do, then it’s not work — right?” he said.
Singer went on to talk about his experience the day he suffered his stroke. “I was on the golf course and my buddies were yelling over to me, ‘Singer, it’s your turn!’, and I was frozen — I couldn’t move and I knew something was wrong… From there, an ambulance was waiting to take me to the hospital.”
He said the hospital gave him stroke clot medication, but it didn’t work. “From there, they took me to Lahey in Burlington… But the clot was too big, and the damage was already done,” Singer said. “At that point, I could no longer speak nor swallow, and I lost feeling on the left side of my body. I can’t use it anymore — and that’s when they said I had to go in for brain surgery – but here I am, making progress every week.”
Progress and determination are central pillars for Singer.
From the beginning of his journey, he’s counted 506 steps that he’s walked so far. “I keep a step diary, and every week I write down how many steps I take… Just last week, I did 53 in a row with the help of two physical therapists.”
What kept Singer going during the tough times, he said, were two lessons — mindfulness and the power of positivity. “When you’re faced with adversity, you are typically consumed with all you’ve lost. I wanted to change that… So I look at what is, and not ‘what if.’”
“‘What if’ is about what you lost, but ‘what is’ is about accepting the new reality,” Singer said. “The most difficult part is to accept the new reality, and that’s not easy at all — but I had to do it, and it’s the positivity that keeps me going.”
Singer also lives by what he calls “The four P’s”. Being patient, being present, being positive and being persistent.
“It’s a principle that has allowed me to access a reservoir of power and resilience that I never knew I had. I’m able to power through things like I never thought I could… It’s really become my roadmap in a lot of ways,” Singer said.
For Singer, resilience means the ability to keep going. “When you’re in pain, you just work through it. Just keep going… Never give up.”
When asked how his friends and family have supported Singer throughout his journey, he had nothing but gushing things to say about those who have helped.
“Unbelievable support, off the charts… People would come out of the woodwork, who weren’t really my friends before, and really stepped up,” Singer said. “My kids, my grandkids, my partner Sheryl, they’re unbelievable.”
“The community support has been overwhelming,” he said. “The staff is extraordinary, they’re so attentive, knowledgeable and so caring… They really want to help.”
When asked if he believed the staff helps foster a sense of community for residents, he said “Very much so.”
He talked about the community aspect more and how it’s impacted him. “It helps you get through the day-by-day-by-day, and the hour-by-hour, because it’s not easy,” Singer said.
Singer also spends his time giving speeches of encouragement around the North Shore, and also noted that he will be writing a book, which hopes will talk more about stroke recovery, in order to educate others about the journey.
